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Questioning Your Beauty

You are beautiful

In today's world, beauty for both men and women, should be only for one person in the world; you. Your beauty is a pleasure to both the mind and the senses, but is still highly subjective.

When someone says to you
"You are beautiful"

The person speaking those words are revealing more about themselves than you. They view you as beautiful, but what is it based on? While it is, and always will be a compliment that a stranger or even a friend thinks you are physically beautiful, more than anything else, what does it say about whom you are? If you are beautiful in they're eyes, do they know how smart you are?

Studying the soul, the mind and the relationship of life.»»

Summer Williams is a Houston Texans cheerleader and she's gorgeous! She's also an aerospace engineer. The fact that she's a rocket scientist and a cheerleader was met with absolute astonishment by football fans and the media. Beauty & Brains

A women's beauty.

You've met her, you like her, you want to take it a step further and you look into her eyes and say "You are beautiful."

The question of today should be why is this good thing to say to a woman? Basically we're congratulating a woman for conforming to society's determined and negatively accepted aesthetic rules. In what way does this make her a good or worthwhile person? How many men have dated beautiful women that later turned into "psycho bitches?" Than, as if to purposely wound the rest of the women, they say

"That's why I don't date beautiful women anymore."


I've had a variety of both positive and negative experiences where the phase "you are beautiful" has been used. However, I've also been the "that's why I don't date beautiful women anymore." women. It's not that I'm an unattractive woman without any physical merits. It's just that I'm not the girl who walks into a bar and stops conversation. I'm not the girl who guys fall all over themselves to buy drinks for. I'm that girl's quirky friend that the guys talk to in hopes that I will convince my friend to give them her phone number.

So again, why is the phase You are beautiful considered one of the highest compliments you can give a woman? You look great in a dress therefore you deserve to be treated nicely. In my mind it reflects a social position that places the success of a woman on how good she looks regardless of how successfully she is. Anther negative variation is the social acceptance that determines a woman's value by the number of children she has.

While this is the majority, it is not the standard. How someone says You are beautiful is what makes the difference between the phase being positive or negative. Since I am a women and have some experience here, allow me to continue with these thoughts.

When a man looks into your eyes and says your beautiful, it's because what's inside of you shines so strongly. She, the person, the individual who his heart is clamoring for, has so seized his being that she is beautiful regardless of the outer shell. Sometimes beauty is an acquired taste. A women (or even a man) who may not be as one acquaintance recently said to me "super model beautiful" the first time you meet her/him can be one of the most beautiful people you've ever seen after you've fallen in love with the person. I'm not only talking about the inner beauty shinning through, but genuinely thinking that a person's appearance is beautiful because of their unique differences.

Here is anther question that still bugs us gurls. Why is it that on days you feel less than gorgeous, people will compliment you about your looks? On those days, we do not feel beautiful and yet, women receive compliments. So does that prove that beauty is nothing more than an illusion in someone else's mind?

Here's a test I fail half the time. Stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself how beautiful you are and believe it.

Some times I fail and other times I look in the mirror and think "Hey I don't look half bad!"

I used to never leave the house without checking my appearance several times and making sure my make up was as perfect as could be. I always thought that I looked better after two hours of prepping. At night clubs and special events and just in daily life errands, I would see all these women with cake made up faces, and they would indeed get all the attention from guys, so I thought to myself "if I looked like that then maybe someone would like me."

Than one day I had to cash a check that my bank told me would take five days for them to approve before cashing. I went to the check's bank and one of the tellers was 'one of the popular girls' that I would often see at a club my friends and I frequented. She looked horrible without the pounds of night club make up and she looked miserable. When she saw me, she was embarrassed because she wasn't wearing her night club make up. I realized afterwards that she was in fact very attractive, but because she didn't believe it, I didn't believe it.

So believe that you are beautiful and you will be. As a matter of fact, after reading this you are now required, to see yourself as beautiful.

Do things that make you feel beautiful.

Make a list of things you have always wanted to do.

I made a list called Things To Do For My Inner Child. Throughout the next year, I plan to do things on the list. They have nothing to do with my career or professional ambitions; the things are activities for me to do simply because I'm curious or have always wanted to try them. Make a list of activities that have nothing to do or do not include putting on make up or heels. Than commit to doing a few in the next few months. The more you do, the more beautiful you'll feel.

If you're questioning this, do some online research and see how good and how beautiful other women are, by doing things they immensely enjoy. As a first step towards better beauty, rent the movie Last Holiday starring Queen Latifah. The movie is one of the best 'chic flick' movies I've seen in a very long time.

Go to college for a new you.»»

10 things that will help make you beautiful.

  1. Find confidence in yourself. Many men have said that confidence is beautiful and isn't it the attention of the bois your trying to attract?
  2. Plastic surgery doesn't always help self-esteem, this could be anther article in itself. Stop thinking "if only I could change..."
  3. Go through your clothing and ask yourself if this XXX make you feel beautiful? If it doesn't, throw it away or donate it to charity.
  4. When you are shopping remember, to consider how you feel in the item. Just because it fits, does not mean you will feel or you are beautiful. Anther thing about clothes, "beautiful" does not mean "slutty."
  5. Give yourself a new hairstyle - Don't be afraid to go with something that isn't trendy or is a bit wild; if you like it that is all that matters. Look through magazines and find a hair style that you like. Take it to the hairdresser and ask if this is a good cut for you. If not, ask if they can recommend a good cut.
  6. Find new things to do. Be open to new things and go for it!
  7. Exercise or play sports! Good health will makes you feel better about yourself as well as gives you more energy.
  8. Be yourself regardless of how geeky it may seem. There are a lot of bois and gurls who love geeks... ever see the t-shirts that say I 'heart' Geeks? It shows your own uniqueness, and what is sexier than that?
  9. Smile! It'll make you feel and look a lot happier and sexier. Guys love to see women smile!
  10. Don't look at other people and envy them. There is always something that you have that someone else doesn't.


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